StarshowerAXO's Xanga

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Thu, 16 Nov 2006 03:21:05 GMT

Does anyone else find the idea of O.J.'s "If I Had Done It" TV interview and book disturbing? And disgusting? Not to mention disrespectful.... I'm appalled.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 23:41:37 GMT

It's an unbelievably sad day in Indianapolis.... I just discovered that Hollywood Bar and Filmworks closed! Without any notice! Terribly depressing news to see such a fabulous place close.... where else can you go watch a movie, have dinner, and have a few alcoholic beverages all at once? I never see movies anywhere else... I do not think that I can go back to attending a normal movie theater. The IndyStar cited Conseco driving up downtown parking prices as the reason their business went down over the last few years causing them to close... But come on, parking at the Union Station Garage right next to Hollywood Bar and Filmworks was only $3 for the entire night even on weekends! I was so looking forward to going to see the Wizard of Oz there on the big screen again.... And I just told my friends yesterday that we needed to go see the Rocky Horror Picture show there sometime soon, because they had never been and it's hysterical and so much fun.... I will truly miss spending Sunday nights there seeing movies while sucking down a cheap pitcher of margarita.... =(

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 04:04:39 GMT

Last week I had my practicum midterm evaluation with my supervisor...

He asked me how I liked school psychology so far and if i felt like I picked the right career path so far....

.... I had to make up a bullshit response to make myself look good....

.... can't be a good sign....

In a happier corner of the world:

Went to Halloween parties. Had lots and lots of fun. Costume was a hilarious hit among drunken people. Good friends brought their children over before they went trick or treating. I painted Haley's face like a puppy... took pics... gave out fabulous Halloween treats because they were our only trick or treaters. So loved being a part of their Halloween. Butler Homecoming = fabulous. Didn't see many people - but being on campus almost brought a tear to my eye. I seriously love that place. I will support it until the day I die. Someday when I have free time again I will volunteer on the alumni board or something. So wanting to buy a membership to their awesome new health and recreation facility - when I have time to workout/go to the hot tub and sauna/swim...

Trying, trying, trying so very hard to be positive....

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Wed, 11 Oct 2006 03:52:10 GMT

Frustration level = high

Why?

Because I'm studying for two essay midterms I have tomorrow back-to-back. Frustration level is exceptionally high for these two midterms, because they are for classes that are completely UNRELATED to the practice of school psychology. (As most of my classes have been...) Seriously - I doubt that a comprehensive and in-depth understanind of Freud's defense mechanisms and group dynamic processes is ever going to do me any good as a school psychologist.

Perhaps to illustrate my point - next week in practicum during group supervision I will tell Dr. McIntosh, "Well, Little Johnny's cognitive scores were in the extremely low range suggesting mental retardation, but I think his real problem is his unresolved Oepidal complex. He really wants to have sex with his mom and murder his dad, and that's really damaging his academic performance in school. Little Johnny is also an African American, and I think the real reason he did poorly on his spelling test is because one of the first spelling words was "black" and some stereotype activation took place, negatively affecting his performance. His classroom also seems to be a highly cohesive group whose norms do not emphasize productivity, and as a result, his classroom performance is quite low....."

Yeah... seriously.... no one in our program finds the curriculum particularly useful....

Current Score: Ball State 5,734,083 - Me 0

On a much happier note - I'm so excited to go see O.A.R. this weekend, and I cannot contain my excitement for Butler's Homecoming the following weekend. Go Dawgs! Beat Valpo! Hehe =) I can't wait to relive the happiest days of my life on campus for a day =)

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 23:30:36 GMT

Reason #10,009 Why I Dislike Ball State:

Today in class we spent over 30 minutes writing out definitions for vocabulary words by hand - you know, like you did in elementary school when the teacher gave you a list of words and then you had to look it up in the glossary in the back your book, write the definition down, and then turn it in. Yeah, exactly like that. Seriously, am I in 5th grade again?

But it gets better... not only did we spend an excessive amount of time working on this menial task.... but after we were done, the prof continues to inform us that he only had us to it to become familiar with a few words and that none of these words will appear on the exam. He then proceeds to pass out a 6 page packet of vocab words he wants us to know for the exam.

Thank you Ball State for providing me with more busy work than my heart could ever possibly desire. =)

At least I'm in practicum this year - practicum is going well.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Fri, 28 Jul 2006 01:08:41 GMT

Just finished Flowers for Algernon. Excellent book. And as usual - a thousand times better than the movie (the movie is Charly). Very sad throughout the book though. Especially hit home for me. Highly reccomend the book if anyone is looking for some good summer reading.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Fri, 21 Jul 2006 02:42:53 GMT

Beauty is pain.....

.... and tripping all over your brand new, super hot stillettos while walking across campus......

.... and then burning off the soles of your feet on the hot pavement, because you realize there's no possible way you'll make it walking back to your car in your brand new, super hot stillettos.....

I'm so not sexy. Lol. And I'm ok with that.

Oh and also... as of today, I'm officially on summer vacation! (Coincidentally Meijer also now has Back-to-School aisles.... I'm not sure whether I should be happy or depressed!)

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Sun, 16 Jul 2006 19:43:32 GMT

My friend Jessica sent this to me today. I find it hilarious, because I think people who oppose homosexual marriages are ridiculous. =) Here's to trying to write discrimination into the Constitution.... lol

10 Reasons Gay Marriage is "Wrong"

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage would be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Thu, 29 Jun 2006 20:19:33 GMT

Currently sitting in class....

Currently obviously not paying attention in class....

I think I just realized I'm in the completely wrong field....

I think I just realize what field I want to be in... should be in....

Shit...

I'm halfway through this program....

Quit now and change?

Finish here and then start all over again?

Finish here.... get a job in school psych.... work on completely new degree part-time while finally obtaining the holy grail of life - a real job that pays me enough to be able to eat.

Opinions appreciated..... =)

(Jenni - I really might be moving to Texas after all. There are programs for what I want to do there..... several... hehe, TROUBLE!)

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Tue, 27 Jun 2006 03:21:17 GMT

It's been a really long time since I've actually updated this thing with anything of real substance... so I suppose it's time, in case there's anyone out there that actually still wonders what's going on in my life. Lol. Just so you all know though... my xanga may be MIA, but I still read everyone else's.

My first year of grad school has been a real battle - as I'm sure most of you already know. I really dislike it, and I've let my discontent affect pretty much all other areas of my life (DJ is a really trooper - he deserves some sort of medal of honor for dealing with my crankiness for the last year.... good gosh, I can't believe we've lived together for over a year now... ) I finally did arrive at the decision to leave the Ph.D. program. As much as it pained me at first to admit defeath, the decision fits me better each day as my contempt for Ball State grows. I've also become more comfortable with the decision the more I begin to consider an entirely different career path... I can see myself returning to school in a few years to do some coursework that would make me elligble for certification as a verbal behavior analyst. It's similiar to the job I have now.

Speaking of my job - the ending of an era is approaching. My favorite 5 year old and I soon will no longer be working together. =( Her home program is ending and she's going to start attending the Verbal Behavior Center for Autism instead. It is a good step for her, but I am very sad to see it end. Anyone who knows me well knows that there are few things I love more than my job/time spent with this wonderful child. I know I've made a large impact on her life with all of the language, social, and play skills I've taught her over the last 2 1/2 years.... but at the same time, I have to wonder if she and her family have possibly taught me more than I ever gave them. I will still be working with her younger brother... but I started there with just her, and I will miss working with her very much (even if she tried to put me in time out last week, hehe). Lol, I'm tearing up thinking about it....

I completed all of my coursework needs for my masters... woohoo... for some reason, I'm not really excited about it. But I felt as if it were worth mentioning. I just don't feel like I did all that much to complete it - over half of the courses were things I already learned at Butler. However, even though I'm not really too excited/proud of it, I would never pass up a good excuse for a party.... lol. DJ and I are throwing a cookout at our apartment at the end of the summer after I officially receive it. Anyone who wants to come is invited.... We are in the process of saving up money to get a keg and food for everyone. =)

DJ and I celebrated our two year anniversay a couple weeks ago. Gosh... two years. Who woulda thunk it? We went to out to dinner and to a movied and to Nicky Blaine's downtown.... nothing like a classy, over priced bar with martinis. =) It hasn't always been easy - with me in class all day and him at work all night. Some days it feels like we don't see each other at all even though we live together. But somehow we make it work. =) He takes care of me and puts up with my crap (and endless bitching about how much I hate grad school). Recently we've started hanging out with a guy from his work and his fiance, and I think that it's been good for us to have another couple to hang out with. Especially some people to hang out with that aren't into the whole party scene anymore. I've really lost interest in the whole dance club/noisy bar atmosphere. I really just prefer to stay in with a couple friends and hang out... where I can actually hear the other people talking to me.

We have some fun plans for the summer... apparently we are going on a trip sponsored by his work to King's Island sometime soon. My good friend Billy from research group is getting married in a few weeks. He lives in Florida now for grad school, and I'm so excited to see him and for DJ to meet him. We have tickets to both Buffett and Kenny Chesney this summer, which is also super exciting. I just went to Tom Petty last weekend with some friends from Ball State. Despite someone asking me to buy him a ticket and then not showing up or even calling to say he wasn't coming, we had an excellent time. I'm pretty sure our drunk dials were enjoyed by all. =)

Anyway.... I think it's time to call it a night. DJ gets home from work soon and I'll see him for about 5 minutes and then go to bed, lol. Such is the life of a grad student..... urgh.... just one more year of this hell.... just one more year.... =)